Metropolis v20!
by Lord Vetinari
Summary: This is what happens when someone watches a movie too much. This is for those who either really remember the movie well or who have seen it multiple times. (I've seen it in all three dubbings.) It helps to know the manga as well.. Anyway. Prepare for
1. Default Chapter

::Ok, I'd like to make a few statements before I begin writing the actual story. First of all, I don't own Metropolis or any of its characters (obviously). Second, I really do love the movie. But that doesn't mean I can't make fun of it. And, last of all, and the most obvious, Rock rocks. That's why he's the least affected character. Thank you. Also, I started writing this BEFORE I read 'Call Me Kenichi'... Anyway. ::  
  
"You can hear the diggers say as they're heading towards the bay 'Oh I gotta dig a duck, gotta dig a duck a day'..." - Gooey duck song  
  
In the beginning, there was only darkness. The darkness was so dark, that the dark was dark and the dark even darker. Yep, it was pretty dang dark. And then, suddenly, a duck said "LET THERE BE RED LINES!" And there were credits. And it was good. A few minutes later, we were confronted with the image of some random guy yelling stuff about achievement in a 50's type setting, as follows:  
  
"I'm really, really happy that I got to state the- uh.. top of humanity's achievements in science and... Chinese food.. so.. um.. yeah.... Oh yeah! And may it stand for a really, really long time! Our Really, Really, Ridiculously Big Tower!"  
  
This was followed by long shots of the Really, Really, Ridiculously Big Tower and somewhat annoying jazz. People cheered, and fireworks flared off. The opening of the Really, Really, Ridiculously Big Tower was a monumental celebration; one that would take a whole week. It was just that ridiculously big. And there was a blimp!  
  
Inside, scientists were debating the differences between Osamu's manga of Metropolis vs. the anime movie Metropolis.  
  
"Laughton was a good guy and there was no Rock!" "But Laughton was still shot- And there was a Fifi!" The debate was hot. And there was the blimp again!  
  
Meanwhile, within the audience back outside, a certain detective and his nephew were watching the fireworks.  
  
"Uncle Shunsaku, what's a Really, Really, Ridiculously Big Tower?" The nephew innocently asked.  
  
"I'm guessing, by the looks of this building, the name, and that documentary on the making of this movie, that's it's a somewhat large tower." Shunsaku replied.  
  
Meanwhile, inside the Really, Really, Ridiculously Big Tower, the press was interviewing the Really, Really, Ridiculously Big Tower's owner, Duke Taupe, the Mayor of Metropolis, General Skink, and President Beane.  
  
"Congradulations!" They greeted. The questions began. "Duke Taupe, now that you've finished construction on the Really, Really, Ridiculously Big Tower, do you plan on going on into politics?"  
  
"It's Duke Orange, first of all." He corrected. "And no, I won't be going into politics. Firstly because as long as President Beane's in state, we have nothing to worry about. And besides, if I make enough merchandise like Hello Kitty, I can rule the world anyway."  
  
"President Beane, would you like to see Duke Orange-"  
  
"Duke Black!" He corrected again.  
  
"-Duke Black go into politics?" Beane shook his head and waved his hand, laughing.  
  
"Don't go incouraging him now; I can't compete with someone so popular." Duke Black smiled, complemented. Beane lit a cigar, and another reporter piped up.  
  
"Is it true that the Really, Really, Ridiculously Big Tower houses military weapons?" There were several gasps, and Duke Black's smile vanished. "Mayor Whatshisface, do you wish to comment?" The Mayor scowled at the nosey journalist.  
  
"You can direct all questions of that sort right to General Skink." Skink, not the most trustworthy looking man in town, grinned a forshadowing evil sort of grinny-grin that dripped of foreshadow and evil.  
  
Back outside, one of many spotlights then came on, but only one man noticed how it was different.  
  
"O-oe, What's with that spotlight?" It had a ducky in the middle, unlike the others.  
  
"Marduck.." An old man behind the detective and nephew muttered, "The sign of the Marducks.." The spotlight was then turned off, and a Marduck stamped out the duck emblem. The figure who had done that was trying to escape, but was spotted by a smaller spotlight.  
  
"There he is!" A Marduck shouted. The figure leapt and landed upon a car. Ouch. To the amazement of those watching the poor person, it limped its way, attempting to make some form of escape, but it was futile; for there, behind him, stood the coolest, smoothest, best-looking character in the whole movie. Rock. Rock rocks.  
  
Rock shot the figure in the leg; it was startled, but continued to try to make its escape. So, he shot again- a fatal blow to the head. The figure- a robot, was terminated. Rock proudly put his gun away. Another job well done.  
  
Once again inside the Really, Really, Ridiculously Big Tower, an old man sat inside Duke Black's over-sized office, looking at pictures of a young girl and biting his thumb.  
  
"I see, I see.." He mumbled to himself. The doors creaked open, and the man turned to see Duke Black himself. He was obviously very miffed.  
  
"Where is she, Laughton??" He began. "You promised me she would be here tonight!"  
  
"W-Well, you see.." Laughton meekly began, but Duke Black interrupted.  
  
"I'm tired of hearing your excuses! I've given you the best facilities and equipment money can buy!"  
  
"Sh-She can be done within the week, Duke Yellow-"  
  
"It's Duke GREEN." Duke Green walked to his desk and picked up one of the pictures on his desk. "I'm going into your lab to see what you've done."  
  
"B-But that's down in Z-Zone One! And b-besides, it's not a place for a man like yourse-"  
  
"I'm going to see what you've done." Duke Green said more boldly. Laughton said nothing more and weakly staggered out of the office. Duke Green's two body guards watched him out and wiped themselves off, and Rock knocked on the open door. Rock rocks.  
  
"Roku desu." He announced. Duke Green was now sitting in his chair, facing the many pictures of the young girl.  
  
"I heard that there was a skirmish down at the plaza."  
  
"There was.. I took care of it." Duke Green became annoyed.  
  
"It's your job to PREVENT those sort of things!"  
  
"Yes, father.." Rock innocently replied, ready for lecture. Instead, Duke Green turned his chair around, his face the very picture of gentlemanly rage.  
  
"I AM NOT YOUR FATHER!!" He slammed his hand against the desk to highten his point. "You were a war orphan I merely adopted, took in, and raised for a good part of your life- Do not call me your father! You have no right- I told you to call me Duke Crimson!"  
  
"Yessir." Rock affirmed.  
  
The next day, Shunsaku and his nephew were in the office of Superintendant Notarlin, awaiting permission to investigate on what they were sent for. The office also had a spiffy window/aquarium thingy! Notarlin was busily stamping away letters and notices as Shunsaku explained himself.  
  
"I was sent here from Japan with my nephew to arrest Dr. Laughton. I was told from a very reliable source that he's been smuggling organs, and is based here in Metropolis.. but unfortunately, this is our first time here and I can't tell east from west, so.." He trailed off, both Shunsaku and nephew gazing at the 10-ft. fish swimming behind the superintendant.  
  
"Well, although Laughton is wanted, I'm afraid that we have all of our men busy with all of the Really, Really, Ridiculously Big Tower's celebrations.." Notarlin looked up to see the two spaced out completely. A loud stamp brought them both back to attention. "Anyway, I can send a robot with you.."  
  
"A r-robot?!" Shunsaku yelped, startled. "What about Police Inspector Ganimarl?? Or Mister Sherlock Holmes??" The stamp was stuck to a paper.  
  
"Yes, a robot." Notarlin finally got the stamp off and sent the paper into the out box. "I'm afraid Ganimarl and Sherlock were there in the manga. Anyway, he's a good robot. He's not lisenced to arrest, but he's very good at investigations."  
  
Later, in the robot-pickup room...  
  
"Do I have to return him with a full tank?" Shunsaku asked, awaiting the robot to arrive.  
  
"Nah.." The robot supervisor replied, "But put souvenier stamps on him from wherever you go, yeah? Like, you know, Egypt, or China.."  
  
"Um.." The nephew started, "We're staying in Metropolis.."  
  
"Then just put a bunch of sparkly stickers on him. I like sparkly things.." The robot arrived, so the supervisor sat back at his desk and continued reading his 'adult' magazine. (It really is! Take a look next time you watch it!)  
  
"Hello!" The nephew greeted. "I'm Kenichi! And you are..?" The robot took off his hat.  
  
"I am 803-DR-P-C-3P0-R-667Y." Kenichi held out his hand. Hesitent, 803 shook it. "N-..Nice to meet you."  
  
Later once more, on the surface of Metropolis. There were radio announcements stating the wonder that was Metropolis and repeating Duke Crimson's eloquent speech in the beginning of this fanfic. And there was the blimp again!  
  
"Now that the Really, Really, Ridiculously Big Tower has been built, Metropolis is the height and culmination of humanity's culture and scientific achievements!" Then it repeated itself in Dude. "Metropolis is, like, da bomb, with that big tower thingie.. Yeah." And in Gangsta. "Yo, Metrop'l's rocks da hood, yo yo." Shunsaku, Kenichi, and 803 were walking and discussing their mission.  
  
"So where should we begin?" Shunsaku asked 803. "Uh..8..03.. uh.."  
  
"DR-P-C-3P0-R-667Y." Kenichi finished.  
  
"How did you memorize that??" The surprised detective asked.  
  
"It's on the screen!" Kenichi answered, looking up. This only confused his uncle.  
  
"Either way.." Shunsaku began again, "We need an easier name for you.."  
  
"Robots are not given names, as some feel it would infringe on human rights." 803 responded. A dog walker scuttled by, holding the leashes of over half a dozen dogs. This gave Shunsaku an idea.  
  
"Then how about Fluffy? Or Rex? Or maybe Fido?" Kenichi giggled.  
  
"Those are dogs' names!"  
  
"I know," replied Shunsaku, "But dogs can be good pets! I had one once.. Perro; good dog."  
  
"So should I respond to Fluffy, Rex, or Fido?" 803 inquired.  
  
"Uh.." The detective brilliantly stated, "Try Fifi." Kenichi now pouted. 803 stood in silence.  
  
"But there's already supposed to be a Fifi!"  
  
"Alright, Gil-Galad then!"  
  
"But that's an elvish king from Lord of the Rings!"  
  
"Mustachio!"  
  
"That was YOUR name in the manga!"  
  
"Bass?"  
  
"The robot from Megaman??"  
  
"Then how about Black Jack!"  
  
"Right author, wrong series."  
  
"Alright, alright, let's just call him Perro." Perro clicked in acknowledgement and the three continued on.  
  
"My assumption is that if Laughton truly were here in Metropolis, his base wouldn't be on this level." Perro finally commented.  
  
"What do you mean?" Asked Shunksaku.  
  
"There is too much security and law enforcement here; he would most likely be somewhere in Zone One."  
  
"Zone One?"  
  
"Yes.." Perro explained, "This city has several layers to it, and my guess is that Laughton would be on the first one."  
  
"Ah!" The detective happily exclaimed, "So you DO have inspector's intuition!"  
  
"No, it's merely an estimation of probabilities." Kenichi giggled once more, but then suddenly a gunshot rang out! It was another Marduck, shooting a large, automated female figure until her head fell off. The Marduck didn't stop though; there was apparently a robot behind it. Only when the robot fell and stopped moving did he end his barrage.  
  
"The heck was all that about?!" The startled Shunsaku exclaimed. The Marducks were dragging the robot's limp body into a large truck-like vehicle.  
  
"That man is a Marduck; vigilantes who exterminate robots who are out of their zone." Perro explained.  
  
"What about the Red Party?" Kenichi asked.  
  
"They were in the manga only." Perro answered.  
  
"Either way, those guys look like cultists to me.." Shunsaku growled.  
  
"Wasn't the line 'facists'?" Kenichi inquired.  
  
"Whatever. I don't like 'em." Was the curt reply.  
  
Down the elevator and into Zone One! 


	2. The Lab Burns Down and Stuff Happens

::Blarg! Blarg, I say! ::  
  
"The problem with visiting Zone One.." Perro stated, "..is that there is little enforcement upon the law, so I urge you to try and be safe while here."  
  
"Can't do that." Shunsaku replied. "We're not here as tourists."  
  
Later that night, and in a different section of Zone One...  
  
Bob the Cat was cleaning himself after another sucsessful hunt. The rat he caught would surely last him the night. But there was something in the air.. a strange, sickly-sweet scent.. Bob took a glimpse behind him, and saw the most horrifying, deformed creature he had ever and would ever see(n). It stood at least six-ft. tall, platinum crest, and the largest nose known to mankind. (I'm sorry, but I just can't get over that nose!)  
  
Of course, we all knew that it was Duke Crimson, but Bob the Cat didn't, so he freaked and ran away. (Which he did in the movie.) Duke Crimson was, of course, on his way to Laughton's lab. Which is where he arrived!  
  
"Duke Green." Laughton greeted.  
  
"It's Duke Mauve." Duke Mauve greeted back. They both went in as Duke Mauve's body guards stood by the door. Of course, they made the mistake of looking only forward; a figure used this advantage and climbed onto the roof, silently.  
  
Both Laughton and Duke Mauve were looking into a weird container doohickey. Duke Mauve placed his hand onto the container.  
  
"Are you sure she's not finished?" Laughton lightly quivered from Duke Mauve's piercing gaze.  
  
"Y-yes; if I started her up now, she would do the macarana, foam at the mouth, sing the national anthem of Canada, play Twister, and then spontaneously combust. At once!" Duke Mauve returned his attention to the girl-in-a-container-doohickey.  
  
"You're not using real organs, are you?"  
  
"No! Not at all! They're a quick fix- they don't last very long. I made all of her organs myself. She's my masterpiece. I just need to make a few finishing touches and-"  
  
"But I want her to be done noooow!" Duke Mauve whined.  
  
"Just wait, she'll be done within the week!" Upset with not getting his way, Duke Mauve left the lab. Laughton took this oportunity to sit in his comfy chair-plus-a-lot-of-computers and get back to work.  
  
"I'm not letting you go to anyone.." The scientist growled. "No sirree, I'm taking you with me and from Metropolis shall we flee!" He was stopped only by the sound of footsteps entering the lab. Laughton was frozen, as a shiver of cold and adrenaline, afraid that Duke Mauve had returned but- No, no, it was a young man.. "I know you! You're Rock- You follow Duke Mauve!" Rock rocks.  
  
"It's Duke Crimson. And I'm here because protecting my father is one of my many duties." Rock walked to the container and glared at it from behind the sunglasses. "Besides, this gets me away from that Rocku author person. ..Kept on trying to spank me.." Laughton shuddered a bit at the uneeded information and tried to ignore it.  
  
"Father..?" The curious Laughton asked. "What were you talking about? Duke Crimson had only one daughter, and she died-"  
  
"IRUSAE!" Rock snapped. (Which means 'shut up', to let you know.) "I know what you're up to." He backed up two steps and took a steady stance. "There is no way I'm going to let my father's heart be taken by a robot." He drew out his gun and aimed. He then paused. "Wait a minute.. Weren't you supposed to be the one who sets fire to the lab, stealing Tima..?" Laughton shrugged. Rock glanced at the script. "Oh, I see, that was in the manga." He resumed his ready-to-shoot pose.  
  
"N-No!" Laughton exclaimed. "You can't do this- she's the centerpiece to the throne of the Really, Really, Ridiculously Big Tower!"  
  
"She can't be! Father wouldn't do something like that!"  
  
"Then are you going to destroy the girl that the one you call 'father' is waiting for?" Rock hesitated. Finally, he relaxed and let his arms fall. Laughton thought he had succeeded when.. Rock turned towards him. "Wh-What are you doing??" The frightened scientists yelped. But it was all too obvious.  
  
Rock had wasted only one bullet on the evil man who had made this abomination, and then he went towards actually destroying the whole lab itself.  
  
Oh ye gods.. he thought desperately, give me the courage to protect my father from the evil that are robots.. and ice cream. He likes that stuff too much.  
  
On his way out, Rock could hardly think. Rather, all that was in his mind was fear. Fear of what he had done, fear of if his father would find out, or anyone else for that matter. And his innate fear of pickles. So he ran. Almost into a passer-by, and took a right turn, up some stairs, and out of harm's way.  
  
Of course, those of who seen the movie would know, the passer-by was Atlas. But he didn't do much about the running Rock. Instead, he was curious about what the Marduck had done that made him run like that, when-! The old factory suddenly exploded! Anomonopia! Sooouuund effeeeeeect!  
  
Kenichi, Perro, and Shunsaku were asking random people if they recognized the picture of Laughton they were carrying when people started running around, yelling 'fire'. Curious, they followed the running crowd as robots sped by, on their way to put out the fires. A crowd was gathering, watching the old factory burn down. Atlas, for reasons unknown, had tears in his eyes.  
  
"My eyes have seen the glory of the burning of the factory.." He tearfully mumbled. Anyway, the robots were dancing a jig (also for reasons unknown) while they waited for the rest of the system to catch up. Finally, Kenichi, Shunsaku, and Perro arrived. Shunsaku practically doubled over, out of breath, while Perro went to inform the crowd.  
  
"Do not panic. The fire department's robots are on their way. And should you feel the cabin pressure fall, safety masks will drop from the ceiling.."  
  
"Shut up!" An agitated spectator cried, whapping the hat off of Perro, "This is a FIRE, not a stinkin' airplane- and you robots have taken our jobs!!"  
  
"This is no time to be stupid, neanderthal idiots!!" Shunsaku exclaimed. Perro bent over and retrieved his hat.  
  
"My hat.." He whined. Then it was Kenichi and Shunsaku's turn to dance a jig, as they freaked from the giant-cockroach-sized thigamajigs, heading for the jiggy robots. After assembling with both these and the hoses, the jigilicious robots started to put the fires out. (I like Rock and all.. but could someone please tell me how he started an explosion like that with a gun?? Or how did the lab burn, when it was mostly metal..?)  
  
"Atlas, did you see who started this?" The jerk from before asked. Atlas, however, was fixated on the fires. (I decided I'll make him a piro.) "ATLAS??"  
  
"Hmm- oh, sorry, what?"  
  
"Did-you-see-who-star-ted-the-fi-re?!" The jerk repeated.  
  
"Yeah, some Marducky kid." He imeediately shot right in to space again, watching the flames. "Isn't it beautiful...?" Shunsaku become more annoyed than he already was.  
  
"I'm sick of this.." He mumbled. "We've read the script, we know what's going to happen.. why do we have to go line by line like this..?! Kenichi! We're gonna screw the script at this point and leap into the fire!!"  
  
"Now we're talking!" Kenichi happily replied, following his uncle to the flaming laboratory. "I get lines! I get to do something!!" Perro stayed in place, still in dismay that someone had actually hurt his hat. The two ran towards the entrance, and split up.  
  
Shunsaku, as we all know, found Laughton. However, Laughton was kinda.. dying-ish. So, he was too heavy to drag out, but the noble detective tried anyway.  
  
"The.. the notebo.." The wounded scientist mumbled, weakly trying to point at his notebook.  
  
"What is it, Laughton?" Shunsaku asked. Realizing Laughton's condition, the detective tried to guess for him. "The christmas chicken? The voodoo llama? The original manga of this movie?"  
  
"N-...note..boo.."  
  
"The double-A batteries? The remote control? The strawberry-flavored, fat- free, sugar-free lollipop? The birch tree?"  
  
"N-..! Notebo-..!"  
  
"The artificial human Michi who looked for his/her parents, went insane, tried to attack Metropolis, and then melted due to the lack of radiation from the sun?"  
  
"NOTEBOOK!" Laughton finally made out. "Michi was in the manga!!" And he then died. Aww.  
  
Meanwhile, Kenichi was looking for anyone else he may find, found a little naked blue girl wander out of the reckage. Of course, the young man was frightened and confused by the girl's appearace.  
  
"I see aliens!" He whispered to himself, and, without knowing what he was doing, took off his jacked and handed it to her.  
  
Elsewhere, Rock (since he rocks) and the author were eating ice cream and double-checking this document for spelling errors and ways to make it funnier. Which it could really use.  
  
"I think that you should make Tima do that spontaneous-combusting thingy." Rock suggested. "And take out that part about Rocku author trying to.. spank me." He shuddered at the memory.  
  
"Nahh." Chibi Seph replied. "Although, Tima randomly exploding IS a good idea.. But nahh." The author then looked to the audience acknowledging this. "To let you know, my muse has kinda run away on a sudden vacation.. that's why I'm including myself in here. And also to do this." Without warning, Rock was glomped. The Marduck tried his hardest to stay calm.  
  
"At least it's not spanking."  
  
Anyway, back to Kenichi.  
  
Both he and the weird girl, (who had lost her hue and returned to a peach,) were trying to avoid the falling wreckage, when the grate they were unknowingly standing on fell from beneath them, and into the darkness they went.  
  
The next day! (And there was the blimp again!)  
  
Rock quietly approached the worried Duke Crimson. "Duke Crimson.." he began, "Laughton's lab was burned down.." Duke Crimson swiftly turned around.  
  
"It's Duke Cyan, you dolt! And where did you hear this?!" Rock let the insult slide. Duke Cyan WAS his father, even if he didn't act like it anymore.  
  
"I saw it on the startup screen from AOL." He truthfully answered. Duke Cyan's face lost its color, and he slowly faced the windows once more. "Considering there were several international arrest warrants for him, whatever it was he was working on was probably illegal anyway.." Now the Duke was starting to shake in anger. "Why are you upset, father?" Rock poked. "He shouldn't really concern you anyway."  
  
"IRUSAI! GET OUT!!" Rock obeyed, with a smug grin on his face. Now was his chance to make sure that his deed was done. If only his father could understand what it was he was doing for him..  
  
Later, down at the burned old factory...  
  
Perro was still upset about his hat. "My hat.." He whined again. Shunsaku was watching the rescue team searching the remains, when he saw the Marduck from the Really, Really, Ridiculously Big Tower's opening.  
  
"Who is that kid, anyway?" The detective asked his miffed partner.  
  
"That's Rock." Perro reluctantly replied. "He's one of the youngest of the Marduck band, but also one of the most influential; even said to be Duke Gray's right hand man. He also has hoards of fans who seem to love him dearly."  
  
"I thought it was Duke Baise.." Shunsaku mumbled. "Either way, what's the connection from him to Duke.. uh.. Gray?"  
  
"He founded and funds the party. It's hardly discreet- a public secret." The detective grinned.  
  
"A penny saved is a penny earned." He looked to Perro. "An old saying, I know, but I like old sayings."  
  
"I thought it was supposed to be-"  
  
"If God lived on Earth, people would break His windows?"  
  
"A criminal always-"  
  
"Brushes his teeth only at night?"  
  
"Returns to the scene of a crime?"  
  
"Oh yeeeaaaahh!"  
  
"Anyway, I'll send in a search warrant for Kenichi. I am sorry I haven't been of more use to you."  
  
"No no, you've been more than a help- you're like my own personal GPS system! It rocks!" Shunsaku didn't even bother explaining.  
  
Rock was searching the rubble. 'Cause Rock rocks. 'I don't understand..' he thought, 'something should be left of her.. she was supposed to be the most advanced robot made- at least her skeleton should be left behind..' Finally, he found a large hole.  
  
"Oey." He signaled to the nearest workman. (It just happened to be that moustached guy.. you know, the one he shot later? The one that keeps on showing up in Osamu's works?) "Where does this go?" The workman peered down into the dark depths.  
  
"Well, if anyone DID fall into that," he began, "First they would go through the sewers of Zone Two, processed at Zone Three, chopped up at Zone Four, mashed in Zone Five, melted together in Zone Six, then processed, chopped, and mashed again at Zone Seven, and, eventually, get pecked to death by radioactive ostriches in Zone Eight. That is, assuming they lived the processing, chopping, and mashing." Rock paused at the ostriches.  
  
"Do we really have Eight Zones?" The workman hesitated.  
  
"Uh... sure, why not?" He shrugged and shook his head. "Either way, I know the ostriches exist.." The poor man shuddered at the memories. "Uh- Anyway, if anyone DID fall into that, there's no way they could survive it."  
  
"Anyone else.." Rock mumbled. 


End file.
